


I can't stand what you do (But I'm in love with your eyes)

by aiienharry



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Coming Out, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Genderswap, Girl Direction, Happy Ending, Horny Louis, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, I love it a lot though, Literally all of the girls are gay, Multi, Mutual Pining, No Smut, Sexual Tension, Summer Vacation, except louis doesn't know, finally I did louis' pov, honestly idk what else to tag, im giving away too much, lesbians in love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-12
Updated: 2018-07-12
Packaged: 2019-06-09 05:24:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15260346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aiienharry/pseuds/aiienharry
Summary: Louis is a pining fool, and so is Harry.





	I can't stand what you do (But I'm in love with your eyes)

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you all like this! I wrote this in 3 days and I edited all by myself so if there are any mistakes please tell me!!!
> 
>  
> 
> [Here is the link to the edit I made!](http://aiienharry.tumblr.com/post/175814325076/i-cant-stand-what-you-do-but-im-in-love-with)

Ever since Louis first set eyes on Harry Styles, she knew that she wanted to touch and love up on her. Wanted to touch the soft pudge that spilled over the waist of her blue jean shorts with stars on the butt. Wanted to smooth her hand over her tan thick thighs, and just hug them close to her chest and kiss them until Harry was a breathless, giggling mess above her.

 

So yeah, Louis might already be in love with Harry, even though they have only talked a hand full of times (interactions that are burnt into Louis’ memory) and even though Harry has somehow turned Louis’ friends into her friend, they still haven’t sat down and really talked to one another.

 

The first time Louis saw Harry is at the top of Louis’ favorite memories. It sits right before the Christmas they spent in Italy when she was fourteen, and right after the time Louis’ mom took her to see this all lesbian band when she was thirteen and she was unsure of who she was. So, the first time Louis set eyes on Harry, was at Niall’s big summer party she had every year when her parents would take their annual trip to the Caribbean’s for the week and leave Niall home alone.

 

Louis was out back taking a break from skating around in the empty pool with all of the stoners that she knew in high school. She was sitting around the edge when she heard a little crash in the back and turned around to see Harry tumbling out of the house like Bambi, like a newborn fowl fresh out the womb. Even though it was almost pitch black outside, except for the places where the porch light hit, Louis could clearly see the redness of Harry’s spit covered mouth from where she sat. Her eyes were wide and green and pretty as she looked them over, not stopping until her eyes landed on her. Louis will _never_ forget the way she smiled when Harry looked at her, and the way Louis looked away embarrassed, and red. Harry’s long smooth tan legs made their way over to where they all were and she introduced herself to everyone, shaking hands and making idle chit-chat. When she sat next to Louis, joint in hand, Louis knew that she was already gone for Bambi girl, already knew that she wanted to keep her and love her and maybe even fuck her.

 

They had introduced themselves and talked for a little bit, passing the blunt back and forth before Louis got up and started skating inside the pool (she was trying to show off to Harry but Zayn started to chat with her so she wasn’t even paying attention). After that, they didn’t talk again until Liam and Zayn decided to call her up when they were heading down to the beach a week later.

 

Those few days when she was still new to town were the _worst_ for Louis. Everyone wanted to talk to Harry and chat her up and bat their pretty little eyes for her. It sucked majorly because Louis wasn’t even sure Harry was _into_ girls or boys or whomever. As long as they were nice to her she seemed to get along with everyone just fine, and for a while, Louis thought that she could live with that. Just being nice to Harry and find another girl to chat up and fuck around with. But of course, she couldn’t get those green eyes and spit covered cherry lips out of her head.

 

Currently, they were all hanging at Niall’s house and lounging around her pool. Harry was in a two-piece suit that she said reminded her of the 70s because the bottoms sat high up on her hips. It was Louis’ favorite of Harry’s entire collection of swimming suits, her tan lines were so visible when she wore them, and the barely-there freckles that sat between her pretty boobs that Louis knew, freaking knew that she could hold each of them in her hand easily if she really tried.

 

Harry was currently talking to Niall about how she wants to get a summer job but no one around here in boring old Astoria would hire her because she was sort of new and… _oh_ . Louis never knew that Harry was seventeen, she didn’t even know when Harry’s birthday was, but she always thought, _assumed_ , Harry was eighteen like them. Louis realizes now that there is a lot of shit she doesn’t know about Harry, like where she lives, if she has any siblings (she’s mentioned a Gem before but Louis was high off her rocker and barely paid her any attention), if she was gay or not (Louis knows that its truly none of her business but _dammit_ she just really wants to know), and even what she was interested in. She mentioned that she liked singing and cats and that she use to live in Southern California with her family before they moved to Oregon to be closer to her sick aunt. That and she liked smoking weed but hated drinking anything that wasn’t wine, those were the only things Louis knew about her.

 

“Lou!” Harry’s voiced pulled Louis out of her head. She looked over to where Harry was sat right in front of her on Louis’ chair, long curls dripping down her face, little droplets spilling down her tanned boobs and _holy shit_. Louis quickly looks back up at Harry and sees something in her eyes she can’t register.

 

“Whaa?” She says, mouth suddenly very dry. _I’m so gay and in love with her_ , she thinks.

 

Harry smiles, her dimples prominent and Louis really wants to lick them and poke them at the same time. Harry wraps both hands around her curls and tries to wring them out. She pauses when she catches Louis staring at her, “I just wanted to know what you were thinking in that _pretty_ little head of yours? You're always so spaced out.”

 

Louis' breath stills and she quickly looks over to where Zayn and Liam are making out in the grass, and Niall is up and pacing around talking to some girl she’s been chatting up (Louis thinks she remembers her naming being Sara or maybe Shawn). She continues to stare at the rest of the girls, hoping the awkwardness between them will pass soon. “Nothin’ just thinking about…summer.” She looks back over at Harry who is leaning back, head pointed towards the heavens and boobs just…. _there_. Literally, they are out right in front of Louis’ face! Her suit top is on the chair dripping wet between them and…this is way too much for Louis' gay heart. The tan lines and the freckles and the small mole that's right beside one of her pointy nipples… _holy shit_. Louis gets up and does the only thing she can think of, she jumps into the pool.

 

-

 

The next time they all meet up again, Harry invites them to the beach. It’s a nice sunny day out and Louis is wearing a two-piece suit she found way back in her closet and was the only clean one she had right now. Liam and Zayn were setting up everyone's beach towels and umbrellas while Niall was chatting up her girl, hand on her waist, whispering lovey-dovey shit in her ear and making her giggle. Harry was stomping around at the shore, her suit today was a one-piece that sat high on her hips, dipped low in the back, and showed off a little of her pale tan-less butt. Louis smiles and walks over to her Spiderman beach towel.

 

“Louis?” Zayn asked, as soon as she sits down, “You know how to cut and dye hair?”

 

Louis looks at her confused, watching as Liam was lathering Zayn's back with sunscreen. “Um, if my _butch look_ is anything to go by then yeah, I’m good at it.” Louis likes to call her short choppy hair a ‘butch look’ just because it annoys and makes her mom laugh sometimes, and the fact that it’s truly a ‘butch look’. “Why do ya ask?”

 

Zayn pauses for a second and kisses Liam before she starts putting sunscreen on _her_ back, Louis rolls her eyes at their sappiness. “I’m _askin’_ because me and H want you to cut our hair, and I want mines dyed blonde.”

 

Ignoring the fact that Harry wanted Louis of all people to actually touch and cut her hair (she couldn’t wait to card her hands through the curls, she knew that they would be soft, probably smelled really nice too), her eyes bug out of her head because, “Wait a fucking minute… _you_ want to dye your hair _blonde_?”

 

Zayn gives her a look, “Yeah, why not? Li says I would look good and Niall doesn’t care that there will be another blonde around to still her thunder.”

 

Niall turns her head over towards them from where she was kissing Sara/Shawn and yells, “Yeah! We need more blondes in this group don’t we, baby?”

 

Sara/Shawn kisses Niall’s nose, “Whatever you say, babe.”

 

Louis glares at Zayn, “If I butcher this you better not kill me.”

 

Zayn smiles, “No promises.”

 

Louis pouts and looks back to where Harry is coming over towards them, out of breath and dripping wet and _Jesus_ …Louis really wants to hold on to her waist and _never_ let go.

 

“Louis, darling?” Harry says, in the _worst_ English accent Louis has ever heard, “Please be a dear and rub some sunscreen lotion on me back?”

 

Louis rolls her eyes and motions for Harry to come over, soon realizing that this the _first_ time that Louis will ever be touching Harry, and it’s the area right above her pretty butt! Harry lays down in front of her and tries to fix her already cheeky bathing suit. The white of her ass up close almost makes Louis' mouth water because her butt is just so peachy and cute. She sighs and grabs the sunscreen from Zayn, squirting some onto her hand and smacking it onto her back.

 

Harry jumps and looks back at Louis, glaring. “I’m gonna get you back for that, _Tomlinson_.” She says the last part mockingly and Louis gets started rubbing the lotion in.

 

It takes her some time to come up with something, _anything_ , to say to Harry to take the awkwardness away. “Uhh…Zayn tells me you want to cut your hair. S’that true, H?”

 

Harry flexes her butt (Louis' mouth waters with want) and says, “Yeah, my moms gonna kill me but I really want short hair. Tired of having to deal with it, and style it and shit.”

 

Louis finishes rubbing the lotion on and sits back. “You sure you really want to do that?”

 

Harry sits up and smiles at her, “It’s only to my shoulders, Lou. Plus, I haven’t had short hair since I was a blonde toddler, but even then my hair was quite long.”

 

Louis looks down at her sticky hands. “I like your long hair though. S’fun to play with.” And _fuck_ , Louis did not mean to say something like that. Although it’s true that she does love Harry’s hair the way it is, curly with some highlights that almost reaches down to her waist, and Louis really loves playing in it like all of the others girls do, she knows that even if Harry shaved her head bald she’d still be beautiful.

 

Harry makes a noise that immediately has Louis staring right back at her. She doesn’t look mad or sad, she has this sort of look on her face that Louis really can’t decipher, and her face is _really_ red. It makes Louis feel bad.

 

“Well…I-I’m glad that you like it, but I’m ready to cut it off.” And with that Harry is up and running off to where the other girls are playing around in the water.

 

Louis hangs back for a second and groans because Harry is going to look so _hot_ with short hair.

 

-

 

After staying at the beach until sundown, they all pack up their shit and get into their respective cars. Zayn and Liam pile into a car with Niall and Sara/Shawn, Louis takes her moms old Sudan, and Harry has her old Jeep. They all head over to Niall’s house to have a girls night where Louis can do Zayn and Harry’s hair while Niall and her girlfriend can make out and Liam can cuddle up to Zayn all night.

 

When they all arrive, just as Niall promised, they were the only ones there. Apparently, Niall’s parents went on a last minute drive to go see some aunt in Washington. Why Niall declined to go, Louis still doesn’t know why.

 

They all huddle into the living room with their things, all changing into some pj’s that Niall hands them while she orders them pizza, and gets the clippers and other shit for Louis to do some hair.

 

Everything is going fine, _great_ even! Louis has seen a lot more boobs than she initially thought she was going to see, but she’s not complaining (she even saw Harry’s boobs again for the second time). Louis volunteers to grabs the pizza from the pizza boy and tips him generously on Niall’s behave (Niall is stinking rich and if she wants to tip the pizza boy twenty freaking dollars then so be it). They gorge themselves on pizza and pop, then afterward smoke a joint that leaves her feeling fuzzy, warm, and relaxed.

 

They put on Netflix and watch Queer Eye for an hour, (Harry cried  _a lot_ and Louis thinks that if she were any character from Queer Eye she’d be Antoni) before they all shuffle up to Niall’s gigantic bathroom. Louis gets started on the task at hand.

 

Zayn sucks in a breath and says, “I really want to buzz it off but…”

 

Louis smacks the back of Zayn’s head, “What the fuck! Zayn, I’m not doing that so your parents can kill me!” Louis yells.

 

Zayn gives her a look, “I'm eighteen Louis, even if my mom gets mad it’s my body and it’s my hair and I can do what I want. Right, Liam?”

 

Liam is tucked into Zayn’s side still feeling buzzed by the look on her face, “Course babe, gonna be so fucking hot and sexy.”

 

Zayn preens under Liam’s words and they started making out for the billionth time today. Louis gags, “Can you please stop swapping spit over there and come here so I can get started?”

 

Harry laughs somewhere behind her and Niall and Shawn (as Louis has learned after badgering Zayn about it) are feeding each other pizza and being a disgustingly cute couple.

 

Once Zayn is situated on the small step stool, Louis starts up the clippers and brings them towards Zayn’s head. She hesitates for a second because this is fucking _insane_ ! Louis is really about to cut off _all_ of Zayn’s hair and no one even seems to care! She and Liam keep eye-fucking each other, Niall and Shawn are being sappy lovesick idiots in the corner, Harry is waiting patiently for her turn while playing games on her phone, and Louis is the only one freaking out over the fact that Zayn is about to be almost _bald_.

 

Louis shakes her head and is about to buzz some off when Zayn yells, “Leave just a little on the top!”

 

Louis grumbles, “Should say fuck it and shave you bald!”

 

Liam glares, “You wouldn’t dare.”

 

Louis rolls her eyes and gets started, shaving the back and sides of Zayn’s hair and putting on a guard when it’s time to do the top. Once she’s done, Louis sits back and lets Zayn have a look.

 

“Holy shit,”

 

Louis panics for a second before she sees the huge smile on Zayn’s face. It doesn’t look bad at all, it makes Zayn look very butch and it honestly makes her face look more angler and model-like. But Zayn has always been hot so it’s nothing new really.

 

Niall walks over and kisses the top of her head, “Lookin’ good, Z!”

 

Harry walks over and kisses the top of Zayn’s head as well, “Might just have to steal you from Liam.”

 

Zayn laughs and stares back at Harry, “You wouldn’t be able to handle me.”

 

Harry shakes her head and smirks, “On the contrary, babe. _You_ wouldn’t be able to handle _me_.”

 

Louis is speechless because after Harry just said what the fuck she just said, she looked back at Louis and says, “ _Lou_ , would be able to handle me though.”

 

“Uh…”

 

Liam cuts her off before she can make a fool of herself, “Anyway! Can we get to the part where Zayn becomes blonde.”

 

Louis blinks and blinks and blinks, she knows her face is red and blotchy from the heat in the room. She clears her throat before going over and grabbing the bag of shit that Zayn brought to dye her hair.

 

“What do we need to do first, Louis?” Zayn asks.

 

“Need to bleach your hair, then we have to wait a week because your hair will fall out if you bleach it so close together. Then I gotta tone it and then I don't know, I have to google it but hopefully, you won't be bald by the end of it. Your hair will be damaged though,”

 

Zayn shrugs, “Figured, with it being _bleached_ and all.”

 

“Don’t get smart. Remember I’m the one doing your hair.” Louis gets started with mixing the developer and the bleach together. She doesn’t need to section her hair off, so she puts on gloves and uses her hands to put the mixture on Zayn’s hair. She makes sure not one inch is left uncovered and places a shower cap over Zayn’s head and tells her to rinse then wash it out after thirty minutes.

 

After cleaning up everything and washing her hands thoroughly, Louis calls Harry over so she can get started on her hair. It’s already one in the morning and Louis is starting to get tired.

 

Harry mumbles, “Remember when I said I wanted it shoulder length?”

 

Louis yawns, nodding, “Yeah, you changing your mind?” Louis starts playing in Harry’s hair, which turns out to be just as soft as she expected it to be, and from where Louis is stood it smells like the Pacific and citrus.

 

Harry shrugs and holds up her phone. On it is a picture of Mick Jagger when he was younger. “Want this instead.” She looks up at Louis like she’s afraid she’s going to shut her down and tell her, no, shoulder length or she’s not cutting it whatsoever. But Louis would never be able to tell Harry no.

 

She smiles, “I can do that, baby Mick.”

 

Harry huffs and laughs, “You know you're not the first person to compare me to him right?”

 

Louis starts cutting, “Not my fault he could be your daddy,”

 

Harry’s nose wrinkles up, “Please, _never_ say that ever again. I almost threw up in my mouth!”

 

Louis starts working on the bangs, “S’not my fault either that you're a baby Mick and he could be your _daddy_.”

 

Harry smacks Louis' thigh, “Stop saying that! You really want me to puke, huh!”

 

Louis laughs and finished off the look, ignore the way she felt after Harry just smacked her _thigh_ because that’s what friends do? Right?

 

“I’m done, baby Mick. Don’t be mad if it’s not exactly like it is in the picture. I don’t think you guys realize that I’m not a professional.”

 

Harry stands up and peers at herself through Niall’s large mirror. “Holy shit,” she whispers, turning her head to and fro. “Louis this…my moms gonna kill me, but _fuck_.” Harry looks at her with tears in her eyes. Louis is speechless because it’s just a haircut right? Maybe Harry has never been allowed to cut her hair and this is the first time? Maybe her mom is strict and is really going to be pissed and ships Harry away to a boarding school where she will remain for her last year of high school? Okay, maybe the last bit is far-fetched but from the way Harry is reacting Louis can’t rule it out. And suddenly, after a moment has passed, Harry wraps her arms around Louis’ neck and pulls her into a tight hug like her life depends on it, and although Louis isn’t compliant one bit, it’s still a weird reaction and she hates seeing Harry so upset.

 

Louis rubs small circles on her back and whispers in her ear, “You okay?” She contemplated saying ‘babe’ at the end but decides against it, because friends don't do that.

 

Harry pulls back and kisses Louis’ cheek, “Thank you so much, Lou.”

 

Louis is stunned like…Harry just placed her spit covered lips onto her cheek. Harry just kissed her on the cheek. _Oh my god_.

 

“H-Harry,” Louis doesn’t even know what to say! Why did she say her name!

 

Harry smiles, “What?”

 

Louis stammers and looks away, “Just wanted to say…you look gorgeous, baby Mick.”

 

Harry rolls her eyes again, “Thank you, idiot.”

 

Zayn comes back in quickly and starts rinsing the stuff out of her hair, and once she’s done she grabs shampoo and conditioner and gets started washing it. Louis can see that it’s a copper sort of color, and it doesn’t look that bad on Zayn.

 

Zayn grabs a towel when she’s done and dries her hair off. She looks at it in the mirror and frowns. “Why does it look like that?” She asks.

 

Louis groans, “I told you we have to bleach it twice! You have black hair so it’s harder to get to that color, you dingus.”

 

Zayn glares at her and turns her head at different angles while staring at herself in the mirror for a while. After a while, she shrugs and says, “Oh well.” Grabbing Liam’s hand, they both leave and Louis looks over to where Harry is sitting on the tub.

 

Louis stands there awkwardly for a second before yawning and stretching her arms over her head. “Well,” she says obnoxiously after Harry peers up at her. “I’m gonna go sleep, cause I’m like _really_ tired so…”

 

Louis turns to leave but a hand grabs her hand and she almost instantly starts sweating when she realizes it’s Harry’s hand.

 

“I’ll go with, _I'm_ really tired too.”

 

They walk hand and hand while Louis tries her best not to panic because Harry’s hands are so soft and they fit in hers so well, while Louis' hands are sweating so bad and she hopes that Harry doesn’t mind.

 

When they get to the living room two big blankets are laid where the coffee table use to be. Zayn and Liam are already cuddling near the fireplace. Niall and Shawn are almost in the middle of the paddle, Niall is watching something on her phone while carding a hand through Shawn’s hair as she sleeps. It’s then that Louis realizes that they are the only ones without significant others to cuddle with and _also_ that Harry is leading them to where the couch is. Louis' heart starts beating faster when Harry starts pulling her down with her. They both lay side by side, shoulders touching and thighs pressed together.

 

Louis lets out a deep breath and turns off the lamp above them so that the only light that's on is the one in the kitchen that Niall eventually gets up and cuts off.

 

It’s pitch black and Louis is sweaty under the thick blanket and it’s really awkward with Harry right next to her so she closes her eyes and forces herself to go to sleep.

 

-

 

It’s still pitch black when Louis wakes up.

 

She sits up and runs a hand through her hair, her throat is dry, her shoulder aches, and her eyes hurt as she tries to adjust to the blackness.

 

And just when she’s about to get up and get some water she hears Harry whisper, “Lou?”

 

And just like that Louis is laying right back down on her side facing Harry who looks to be wide awake. “Yeah,” she whispers back. “What are you doing up, Curly?”

 

“Couldn’t sleep.”

 

Louis is about to question her some more, but Harry places a gentle hand on her face and Louis' breath quickens as Harry gets closer and closer until-

 

Their kissing, it’s hot _so fucking hot,_ and Louis is sweating _so fucking bad,_ but she can’t seem to care because she’s kissing the girl of her dreams and she’s _so fucking happy_ that she can’t stop the smile that spreads on her face. The kiss is delicate but sensual at the same time and Louis really wants to mouth at Harry’s boobs, but it’s not the time nor place to do any of that but soon, _soon_ she will.

 

Harry’s hand finds its way onto Louis' waist and Louis palms Harry’s thighs and _oh god._ Louis is embarrassedly wet but she doesn’t care that her underwear is fucking ruined right now because Harry’s hand is now palming the chub on Louis' waist, and Louis slowly inches up from Harry’s amazing thighs to her cute peachy ass and _shit._ Louis deepens the kiss and lets out a small moan that she hopes doesn’t cause too much noise.

 

That’s when Harry scoots back, she’s breathing heavily and her hands leave Louis waist and _no no no!_ “What’s wrong, babe?”

 

Louis can’t see Harry’s face and everything is going to shit because Harry doesn’t say a word as she gets up and leaves Louis confused and heartbroken on the floor.

 

-

 

It’s been two weeks and Harry has been avoiding her like the plague.

 

They haven’t talked since that night at Niall’s house and to be fucking honest Louis feels like _shit_ and she’s starting to get a little angry. She feels like shit because maybe she read the whole situation wrong which leads her to anger because this isn’t a fucking _game_. Louis knows that straight girls like to kiss other girls for fun sometimes, but she didn’t think Harry would do something like that. Harry has _heard_ Louis and Zayn mention and talk about how hard it is to be a lesbian and the struggles, she fucking _knows_ and yet. Then Louis' anger makes her feel even more like shit because what if Harry is in the closet and Louis took advance of her in some way?

 

It’s an endless cycle and Louis just really wants it to _end_ because it fucking _sucks_. She hasn’t felt this way since she was twelve and during a school dance, she kissed a girl who she was head over heels for and the same girl moved away the next day and took Louis' broken heart with her.

 

Louis was at home, she hadn’t hung out with the other girls in a week nor talked with them in the same amount of time. She ignored their calls and cried when she felt like it. Her mother, bless her, hadn’t mentioned anything yet but she knew it was only a matter of time before she made Louis shower and tell her what was wrong.

 

That day came faster than Louis wanted, she was in the kitchen eating some cereal when he mother came in, in her scrubs, after working a night shift at the hospital.

 

“Are you going to tell me what’s wrong or are you going to continue to stink up my house?”

 

Louis grumbled, “‘M fine, mama.”

 

She sighs and rubs her temple, sitting down her purse on the counter and staring at Louis. “I know you're not fine. I can see that you're not fine. You are my kid, you know? I spent ten hours in labor trying to get your big head out of me and-”

 

Louis almost chokes on cereal, “Ok, _Jesus_ mom!”

 

Her mother smiles and walks over towards her, kissing the top of her hair, “I can’t give you my advice if you won’t tell me what’s happening, sweetheart.”

 

Louis doesn’t even contemplate not telling her, she lets it all spill out and by the end, she has tears in her eyes and her mother is hugging her tight to her chest. She exhales.

 

The tears fall and fall and fall and Louis shudders with each breath she takes. “I screwed up, mama. I really screwed up.” It takes her a minute to say it, and it takes her even longer to just breathe.

 

“You didn’t screw up! You both wanted to kiss each other, if she didn’t want to kiss you she shouldn’t have kissed you.”

 

Louis pulls back and shakes her head, pressing the pads of her fingers on her eyes. “You don’t understand what it feels like. When you're a lesbian you always feel like your screwing everything up, because you don't even know if the person is gay or not, or if you're coming on too strong! She never said she was gay, but at the same time she never said that she wasn't and…and-”

 

“Louis, baby calm down.”

 

“-And you're constantly afraid that you're feeling predatory and- fuck! She looked so…sad and angry, I think, and it's all of my fault!”

 

Her mother pulls her into a hug and rocks her back and forth, shushing her when he sobbing gets worst. It hurts so bad, she just can’t stop crying because she loves Harry and she screwed it up.

 

“Louis, I…I know that I will _never_ be able to feel what you feel like, as a young lesbian, but I’m going to be frank with you,” She pulls Louis away from her and kisses her forehead. “I know that you would never do anything intentionally to hurt anyone, and I know that if you knew Harry felt any discomfort you would have stopped immediately. I’m going to say it again because I firmly believe that if Harry truly didn’t want to kiss you then she wouldn’t have initiated it. We don’t know why she left, and we don’t know how she felt, so we can’t just assume that she was angry or scared until you talk to-”

 

Louis wipes away the tears, “That’s the problem! She won’t even talk to me, every time I look at her she looks away. Every time I say something to her she just nods or hums and that's it!”

 

“Have you tried to bring up what happened then?” Louis shakes her head no. “Then why haven’t you? You sitting here and crying into your cereal isn’t helping no one!” Louis stays silent making her mom sigh, “I have to go pick up the girls from day camp, and when I get back I want you showered and out of this house.” Louis watches as her mom grabs her keys and her purse, “You smell bad and it’s making my house stink! Go shower!”

 

Louis rolls her eyes and slowly makes her way to the bathroom and hops in the shower.

 

-

 

Louis is parked outside Zayn’s house thinking about turning her car around and going home. Apparently, all the girls were over at Zayn’s house for a movie night, information she got from a text in their group chat.

 

Louis was beyond nervous, she didn’t want to just lay it all out for Harry, but at the same time, she didn’t want to _not_ say anything at all and continue to act like everything was fine. After sitting in the car for another thirty minutes Louis musters up some courage and walks to Zayn’s door, she didn’t even tell anyone that she was coming. She knocked on the door a few times before Zayn opened it, Louis immediately noticed that Zayn's hair was a dirty blonde color like Niall’s, and she looked amazing.

 

Zayn looked her up and down, a frown on her face. “Where have you been?”

 

Louis crumbles into her arms, lucky Zayn holds her up. “I’m so sorry, Z. I've been such a shit friend for leaving you in the dark about everything.”

 

Zayn rubs circles into her lower back, “It’s okay, Louis. But why have you been ignoring our calls? We’ve all been worried about you.”

 

Louis leans back and gives Zayn a quick summary of what’s been going on. “Still not an excuse as to why I was ignoring calls and text, and I’m really sorry that I did!”

 

Zayn stares at her wide-eyed for a while, shaking her head. “You know Harry has been really worried, she didn’t stop calling you until we told her that blowing up your phone would do nothing.”

 

Louis winces because she saw all the text and calls from Harry and still didn’t do shit, she saw all the texts and calls from _all_ of the girls but she decided to exile herself selfishly. “I…I don’t know what else to say, but I am really _really_ sorry for being such an idiot.”

 

Zayn shrugs and wraps an arm around Louis' shoulder, pulling her through the entrance hallway and into the living room where everyone is. All eyes immediately go to Louis who immediately starts to sweat and blush from all the stares.

 

Niall is, of course, the first to break the ice and speak, “Why are you all the way over there, Lou? Come ‘ere and give me a little cuddle, haven’t seen you in a week you know.”

 

Louis walks over to Niall and gives her a hug, “I know, I’m sorry I was just going through some shit.”

 

Liam gives her a hug next and says, “But your okay now right?”

 

Louis nods and gives Shawn her hug and settles down on the other side of Niall right next to Harry. They don’t say anything to each other and Louis knows that everyone can tell that there is something going on with them. Louis was planning on confronting Harry before the pizza got here and the before movie started. She talked and joked around with everyone and soon the awkwardness she felt about being there was gone. Her time to talk to Harry came when she went into the kitchen to go check on some brownies she was making. Louis waited behind a minute to not raise suspension before going in.

 

She walked in slowly just as Harry bent down to pull out a tray of brownies and sat them on a rack. She jumps a little when she looks over at where Louis is standing.

 

They stare at each other, Louis leaning over the counter and Harry standing next to the brownies. She shakes her head because this is fucking _ridiculous_!

 

Louis takes a deep breath, “Look, I just wanted to say sorry for what happened two weeks ago. It was obvious that you regretted what happened and-”

 

Harry looks up at her, frowning, “How could you think I would regret that. I fucking…Louis I…”

 

Louis sits up straight now, “Then why did you react like that? I thought I freaked you _out_ , thought I ruined everything.”

 

“I didn’t mean to react that way, I just…I sorta freaked out because I’ve never kissed a girl before, but I’ve always known that I was…”

 

Louis watches Harry struggle to say it, and this isn’t how she wanted this to go, because Harry looks like she’s on the brink of tears. Even if Louis felt giddy because Harry didn’t regret it! The tears and the sad feeling she had wasn't supposed to happen.

 

Louis walks over towards Harry, keeping her distance. “You don’t have to come out if you aren’t ready, I know how hard it is to get the words out. It’s like…it’s on the tip of your tongue and your so ready to say it, but you keep hesitating and…I just want you to know that you don’t have to tell me or anyone jack _shit_.”

 

Harry nods and wipes a tear away, “Louis, I’m really fucking gay okay?” Louis nods, watching as Harry’s eyes fill with tears. “I just feel like shit because I lead you to believe that you hurt me. How could I…I acted like everything was okay afterward, but you were hurting and it was my fault!” Harry was animated now, swinging her arms to and fro and letting the tears that have gathered fall. Louis knows that if she hadn’t cried during the whole week she would be crying with her.

 

“Harry, you…it’s okay really. I’m not gonna pretend that it didn’t suck, and I’m not going to pretend that everything was fine because it wasn’t.” Louis looks down and rubs scratches the hair on her neck, “You…I know it’s a bit dumb of me to assume shit, but I really thought you were a straight girl that just wanted to kiss a girl. I just…”

 

Louis stopped immediately when she sees the way Harry’s bottom lip starts wobbling, Louis groans because this isn’t the way she wanted this to go at all!

 

“Please continue, Lou. I don’t want you to hold back because I’m crying like a dumb baby.”

 

This is going so horrible, and Louis can’t just stand here while Harry cries. She grabs Harry’s wrist and pulls her into a hug, cradling her head against her chest as she cries. Louis whispers in her ear, “This is not how I wanted this to go,”

 

Harry stands up straighter and puts her head on Louis' shoulder, “How was this supposed to go?”

 

“I just wanted to know if you were okay, and why you acted the way you did so I could fix it. I hate not talking to you, even if we don’t talk to each other all that much.”

 

“I love talking to you, Lou.”

 

“I don’t want you to cry again, but I have this huge crush on you. Like I like _like_ you, Harry. And when you kissed me I thought you liked me too.”

 

Harry stands up quickly, a worried look on her face, “I do like you, Louis. That’s why I kissed you! I just…you are the first girl that I have ever kissed and it scared me a little. I came back and tried to say something to you but I thought you were asleep.”

 

When Harry came back to the paddle on the floor that night, Louis had moved over as far as she could and turned her back to Harry, hoping she would leave her alone and think she was asleep.

 

It was stupid and petty when Louis looks back on it, and she wishes she hadn't done it. “Yeah,” she says, “I just was feeling really down and I didn’t want to talk to you at that moment.”

 

Harry lets out a watery laugh and pinches Louis' waist making her squirm away. They both sigh. Louis leans against Harry, face planted right between her boobs. She does this to hide the smile on her face because Harry just said that she fucking _liked_ her! “You really like me, H?”

 

Harry cards her hands through Louis' hair, tugging and making Louis twitch a little. “Course I liked you, kinda put my boobs in your face when we were at Niall’s a few weeks ago.”

 

Louis leans back and lightly slaps Harry’s thighs. “I freaked out so bad when you did that! I went into gay overdrive and flung myself into the pool!”

 

Harry laughs, the whites of her eyes are still red and he eyes are still puffy and her lips are red from the way she keeps biting them, but at least she has a smile on her face. “That was so dumb of me, I don’t even know what I was expecting! For you to just fill me up while everyone was there!”

 

“I wanted to,” Louis blurts out. She clenches her eyes shut and shakes her head when she realizes how horrible that sounds. “I mean…fuck I don’t know what I meant. But your body is fucking amazing, H.”

 

Harry looks down at her body then gestures to Louis, “My body? Louis, you are the most prettiest, handsome-est, most gorgeous person I have ever meant in my life! I couldn’t stop staring when you would show up in that red bikini all the time! Your boobs were practically spilling out of the sides and your pubes and your ass!”

 

They’re both laughing their asses off now because all of this time Louis thought that her feelings were total one-sided, all this time Louis thought that she was weird for being into Harry the way that she was. All this time and Harry liked her back.

 

Louis smiles so brightly and kisses Harry, ignoring the way their teeth knock against each other, and how Harry’s lips sort of taste like snot. It’s wonderful and it’s everything that Louis has ever wanted.

 

“So,” Louis says, “Can we please be a together, you know, date and what not?”

 

Harry grabs the tray of brownies with oven mitts and Louis is _swooning,_ she’s so fucking _gone_ for her.

 

“Sure, as long as you promise to wear that red bikini again.”

 

Louis snorts, “Done.” She leans up and kisses Harry again, making Harry sit down the tray and grab Louis by her waist.

 

They lean away from each other after a while, the other girls were calling them and the brownies were probably cold but Louis could care less. She’s got a beautiful girl, that she gets to love on and kiss on and even fuck if she wants, if Harry allows her too.

 

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is aiienharry! Follow me for updates! [Here is the link to the edit I made!](http://aiienharry.tumblr.com/post/179589306021/been-waiting-on-you-all-my-night-by-aiienharry-so)


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